Pancakes for Sharks.

For me there really is nothing like having fifty pounds of ravenous 6 year old offspring land squarely in your abdomen at 7:00 a.m. on your day off and announcing as if it is in some way different than the other two thousand two hundred and thirty four days of his life that he is hungry. In six years time his weight has clearly increased (just ask my spleen). He has improved the speed and agility of his approach from his bedroom down the hall and subsequently the length and height of his take-off from the floor onto my groggy but panic stricken torso. He has also become unwittingly adept at communicating his urgent message of imminent starvation in a clear and concise intelligible language. After moaning loudly and writhing in pain from the impact,

(me): "Have you brushed your teeth yet?"

(Offspring #1): "No, I'm waiting until after breakfast so I get all the germies."

(me, having been outsmarted and trying to buy a moment for the pain to subside): "You need to get dressed first, O.K.?"

(Offspring #1): "I'll get dressed after breakfast. We're not going anywhere before breakfast anyway."

(me, clearly not on my A-game): "I will make you guys some breakfast as soon as your brother gets up, O.K.?"

Suddenly like a fly shooed from the cole slaw at a picnic he is gone and like the same fly he is back, immediately. Except now he brings his equally ravenous and even more tenacious little brother. They bound simultaneously into the bed with absolutely no regard for my life or limb.

(Offspring #2): "I'm hungry da-da."

(me, now defeated): "Good morning baby. Did you sleep well?"

(Offspring #2): "I'm hungry!"

Resistance is futile. Like sharks circling their prey they will not let up now until their appetites have been satisfied.

This morning, like so many others, requires immediate action. Not because I don't have time, let us recall it is my day off, but because there are two little ticking time bomb male metabolisms sitting on my chest threatening epic repercussions for any failure on my part to feed them.

My trusted and typical solution for these urgent early morning meals is a big pan of six fluffy, buttery and most importantly, fast, scrambled eggs. The boys love scrambled eggs and I love to make the boys happy but a man (read, growing boys) cannot live on eggs alone. Enter homemade instant pancake mix. To be honest, this is Nigella Lawson's recipe in which I regularly substitute whole white wheat flour. The whole white wheat flour makes these pancakes golden and slightly nutty without being suspiciously dark and grainy. It also makes me feel more paternalistically virtuous.

Homemade Instant Pancake Mix

Combine well and store:

4 cups all purpose whole white wheat flour
3 tbsp. baking powder
2 tbsp. baking soda
1 tsp. salt
2 1/2 tbsp. sugar

I keep a canister of this mix made up in the cupboard. With a little help from the boys (read, circling sharks, which also helps to distract them from their grumbling stomachs) whisking together

1 cup pancake mix
1 cup milk
1 egg, and
1 tbsp. melted butter,

I can have a couple stacks of delicious kid size pancakes glistening under a slick of melted butter in a matter of mere moments. A dark amber drizzle of pure maple syrup and "VOILA!" time bombs diffused, metabolic disaster averted!

I cannot describe the joy that comes when that hungry silence falls back over the house early in the morning as my boys tuck eagerly in to their breakfast.

May you experience that kind of joy today.